At City Church, we love to remind each other of God's story of creation, fall, redemption, & renewal. We also strive to remind each other that God's story intersects with our own personal journey. Each Tuesday for the next 8 weeks, a City Church attender will be sharing a piece of their story on our blog of a time when this intersection was especially evident for them. Today's story comes from Greg Luna.
I have participated in worship services on and off throughout my life. However, as a child, it was obligatory because my father drove our family to church. As an adult, my “participation” was at best random. I confess the autonomy to make my own schedule that included sleeping in on Sunday mornings was a welcomed freedom that played a factor.
Although my attendance was sporadic, I always contemplated God. I wanted a better understanding and relationship with God. God was present but remote. There was more than a fair amount of questions and rationalization on my part about how I was living my life in accord with the teachings. I read the Bible independently and also read secular books on religion and Christianity but wanted a deeper understanding and better relationship with God. On one of my visits to church, the priest opened his sermon with two frank sentences:
“You chose to have your relationship with God. You define that relationship.”
Confronted with candid language, I acknowledged I was remiss despite my self-proclaimed interest. The image of Michelangelo’s painting “Creation of Adam” on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel came to mind. God is looking directly at Adam with his arm fully extended reaching towards Adam. In the portrayal, Adam does not respond with the same outstretched arm. He is indifferent. Adam is reclined and aloof. His arm is resting on his bent knee; a feeble effort. His limp wrist demonstrates his lack luster attempt to meet the hand of God. I thought: “Am I not guilty of the same?”
I spent a good portion of my childhood asking questions about all kinds of things: Who is God; Why should we be glad Jesus died on the cross; Did he really die for us; What does [insert curse words here] mean? (They called Renee Bernard a certain name on the school bus one morning on the way to school.) To my father’s credit, he tirelessly entertained all of my questions. In doing so my father fostered in me a healthy curiosity and that it is good to ask questions. When confronted with the two-sentence introduction from the priest I realized I still had questions but stopped seeking answers. The Apostle Thomas had doubts and asked questions. Most poignantly, he doubted the resurrection. He had to see and feel the wounds to believe. Jesus welcomed those questions. There are stories throughout the Bible that demonstrate Jesus not only embraced questions from honest seekers but elicited them. For me, the significant lesson in the story about Thomas was when it was further explained to me: “Thomas’ faith was strengthened by asking those questions.”
Was it random or God reaching? I was at Bethany Roberts’ house for a Neighbor Game Night. It was a casual gathering of neighbors laughing and playing board games. Through that, I met Maggie Lyon who invited me to Community Group. I had hoped to find a Bible study group and the Cool Spring Community Group fit what I had hoped to find. From that, I was invited and encouraged to attend City Church. So here I am…
When City Church opens the service each Sunday by saying “We welcome the believers, the non-believers, and seekers …” that is me: a believer, a seeker. I still have questions. I still ask questions but I am also learning, and growing in faith with a better relationship with God and a better life.